Still Arriving
This is a blog about living with HIV. When it was first started 6 years ago it was meant to keep friends and family informed of my health. It does still hold that purpose but it has become my life work. To my readers I just want to say thank you. Your words of kindness and inspiration over the years have kept this going. This isn't my blog anymore...this is a blog for all in the fight with HIV/AIDS.
05 May 2013
Still alive and kicking!
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15 June 2011
Today's A Big Day!!!!
I have expressed many times that I am humbled by the overwhelming and unexpected success of this blog. Without you the followers and readers this blog would have just disappeared. With you help I have been able to reach people who not only just found out they were positive but others who have in fact been living with HIV/AIDS for years. With many thanks to ALL of you my dream of spreading awareness and giving a face to this illness is reaching a new height. Yesterday I was contacted by a Senior Producer at CNN who asked if I would be interested in being a featured guest on CNN live to discuss living with the illness and how over the years I have thrived. I jumped at the opportunity and can't wait to share my thoughts with the world. The segment is scheduled to air TODAY AT 1:45 CENTRAL TIME WHICH IS 2:45 EASTERN.
Yes, I took the first step by creating this blog but since then its been you who have taken the steps to help make my blog, not me, the true success story. I am forever humbled and in your debt for helping to give me this once in a lifetime opportunity. I hope to not only do this blog, my friends and family, proud but most of all I want to make YOU my followers and supporters proud. Thank you again for your help, love and support over the years. You are the true stars.
With many thanks, hugs, and love,
James
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03 June 2011
Update brewing!
While sitting at my doctors office today I was reviewing the sheet that goes over why you're actually seeing the doctor and realized that HIV is listed as a common diagnosis. I've attached the photo of the sheet. It makes me sad that its listed under common :(

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12 May 2011
AIDS is getting old!
Turning 30 is a huge milestone birthday, at least, it was for most people I know. In the months leading up to my birthday I used the time to evaluate where I stood in my life. What were my accomplishments? What were my failures? As AIDS approaches its 30th birthday the people who fight the disease are asking the same questions.
While we've made significant advances against the disease, such as new medications and expanding access to treatment. HIV/AIDS is still a killer. AIDS has become the elephant in the middle of the room that no one wants to talk about. By allowing that to happen we've done a massive disservice to the early pioneers and AIDS advocates. Where modern day activists accept a promise of hope, maybe, 10 years from now the first generation of AIDS activists demanded action and answers. I m inclined to believe that the fight against HIV has willingly been placed on the back burner because our attitude has been influenced by the pharmaceutical industry.
In my opinion there is one large, unspoken truth that society has swept under the rug. While contracting HIV is not the immediate death sentence it was in the 80's and 90's. It is however, still a death sentence. Just because the medications prolong my life and help me from getting sick longer, doesn't mean that the complications from the illness will not eventually claim my life. Every 12 minutes someone in the world dies from AIDS related complications. Anti-retro virals are great. The medication Fuzeon literally saved me safe in 2006. They are my life line. However, the meds are expensive, require a strict adherence schedule and sometimes fail. I cant personally take any medicine in the NNRTI class or Isentress. This limits my fighting ability greatly. Eventually all medications lose their desired effective treatment ability. As with everything it's only a matter of time.
I am saddened, aggravated and non apologetic for my brutal honesty and no nonsense dialogue in the war against AIDS. I feel that as an activist I have the responsibility to not sugar coat or make light of this disease or its effects. I wish I could say that there is a magic pill or simple answer. There isn't. That's the reality. As we come closer to the 30th anniversary of the discovery of AIDS as we know it I would like to say its reign of terror is nearing end. That sadly isn't the reality. AIDS is a live and well. Together though we can ensure that AIDS doesn't have a 40th birthday. I know it's possible if we are open, honest, and look at HIV/AIDS as it really is. A cold blooded serial killer who needs to be wiped off the face of the Earth. After 30 years there is still no cure, no vaccine, and no end in sight.
Latest AIDS statistic:
0,000,000 CURED.
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22 July 2010
PCP, Civil Rights, and Harvey Milk
The first thing I want to cover is civil rights. Miss Sherrod (former USDA official) has been all up in the news recently and as I was sitting on the bus today I noticed the Civil Rights Act posting on the interior wall. I got to thinking what if the Civil Rights Act of 1964 read: "Under federal law it is unlawful to deny access or services with regards to race, color, national origin or sexual orientation. " Where would the GLBT movement be today? Adding two little words could have set our movement light years ahead. Remembering that the infamous Stonewall Riots occurred only 5 years after the signing of the Civil Rights Act. Hmmmmmm just some random thought.
I just got out the hospital on Tuesday after a week stint of PCP. Yes my friends, PCP. My CD4 count is at 200 and my viral load at 4800. My chest x-ray was clear but when they did the CT scan with that wonderful toxic, body warming, nuclear contrast they noticed the tell tell signs of inflammation and 7 different infiltrates growing on my lungs. We all remember my wonderful time with infiltrates and the lung shortly after I started my blog. Joyous occasion. I say all of that to say this. While I was shacked up in Northwestern Memorial Hospital I got to thinking...Where would the fight against HIV/AIDS be TODAY if Harvey Milk had not been assassinated in 1978 just 4 years before the epidemic was diagnosed in the US for the first time. For those of you who need a refresher or don't know who Harvey Milk is (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Harvey_Milk). Harvey Milk is my hero and idol. I have based my public service career based on his tactics. He was an amazing man. Anyway he was instrumental in defeating Anita Bryant's Campaign in California and the State's Proposition 6 ballot. Prop 6 would have allowed firing of any public servant just because of their sexual orientation. This was the first time the extremists had been defeated in the Nation. And he spearheaded the movement. If in fact he was able to do that IMAGINE what he could have done to the face of early face of funding for HIV/AIDS. WOW. The gifts/talents our nation will never see affects us all. How sad is it that the bullet of a madman really ruins the possibility of a brighter future for millions?
Remember the commercial "What would you do for a Klondike Bar?" I want to rephrase it a bit...What would you do....
- to save the life of a loved one?
- to save your own life?
- to prevent or attempt to prevent someone from making the biggest and costliest mistake of their life?
- to save your relationship?
- to become a more honest and caring person?
Such questions really cannot and are not easily answered. We put strings, stipulations, and expectations on them when these are the questions that in all honesty should be no brainers and simple one line answers...ANYTHING! "Well they hurt me" Well it doesn't mean you stop caring or loving that person! I have found myself going to extremes from swallowing a bottle of pills to physical violence because the person I love more than life itself would rather sleep with someone other than me. Does that make it right NO. I really struggle with self esteem and the feeling of not being loved. Not by family or friends....the other kind of being loved. However, I digress. These are just some random thoughts and issues I am sorting through right now. It's late kiddies and my nighty meds are starting to kick in :) I'm going to close for now. Until next time.
Hugs and love,
James
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10 July 2010
New Winds of Change
Hugs and love,
James
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23 March 2010
No Lie Can Live Forever
So as many of you know I have been advocating for Universal Healthcare since this blogs creation and started experiencing the cold shoulder of insurance companies. What exactly does the passage of this bill mean in the immediate for most Americans? Well I am glad you asked. Within the next 6 months the following will take place:
- No lifetime limits or maximum lifetime payouts
- Free preventative Medicare treatment
- No annual benefit limit
- You cannot be dropped due to illness
- Small business will get tax credits to help provide coverage to employees
- Adult aged children up to 26 can be on their parents plan
- Drug cost assistance to seniors
- Children cannot be denied due to pre-existing conditions
- A small high risk pool will be made available to adults with serious pre-existing conditions who have not been covered by insurance within the last 6 months. All others will have to wait until 2014.
- Social Security (which was said to lead to socialization and communism) passed by Democratic congress. Opposed by GOP (wonder if we can get the members of Congress who are about to or are currently collecting it to give it back or refuse payments).
- Medicare (was said that having this program in effect would lead to socialized medicine was opposed by Reagan) passed by Democratic congress. Opposed by GOP
- Civil rights legislation, passed by Democratic congress, opposed by GOP.
- Healthcare Reform, passed by Democratic congress, opposed by GOP.
More Republican senators feared the passing of this bill than a terrorist attack. That's according to one GOP lawmaker. You keep focusing on Healthcare and keeping Americans sick while a plane flies into another building. Your old boss is a great example to follow. You remember September 11, 2001 when terrorists were attacking our country and Dubya sat on his ass in a Florida classroom reading My Pet Goat?
In closing I have the following to say to the Republicans and Tea party members. You fear making and keeping Americans healthy over that of a terrorist attack? Nothing more can be said than what has already been said by Minority Whip Boehner "SHAME ON YOU." There is a special place in hell for all of you. You're on the short end of the moral dipstick and I look forward to karma kicking all your selfish asses.
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